Wife advice please- woman only?

My wife might be going through a mid-life crisis. She is faithful to me without a doubt. Sometimes it's like we are the only 2 in the world, other times we are a million miles away. Her career did not turn out as planned, we have been try to conceive for 9mths. no luck, She has flirted but kept it at that. She loves me i know, i am doing everything possible to keep her happy and excited. Any ideas or advice, is this going to pass soon, going nuts and getting very depressed. she is my soulmate.Wife advice please- woman only?
Talk to her and make her feel that you love her so much! Take her out to dinner, movies, plan surprise vacations for her. Try to take her mind off of things that make her depressed. Do thte things you both used to do when u first met up, take her to the same places you used to go. Spark up the love. Surprise her with the th ings she likes....Wife advice please- woman only?
In addition to the very good answers above, do your best so she can ger some time out. A long weekend for herself, either alone or with her friends or family (if she has a really good relationship with them) can do wonders. Get her a spa certificate, or just arrange your things so she can spend a weekend alone at home. Buy for her groceries, flowers, candles... whatever she thinks it might help her feel relaxed and pampered, so she does not worries about house chores for a couple of days.


She need to feel herself again, not the wife, the woman trying to conceive, the failed-career woman... just herself.


And gently and respectfully, suggest therapy for both, it can do wonders!
Talk to her and let her know how you are feeling about everything. Let her know that is is upsetting to you to that you are having problems conceiving. If she is flirting with other guys it is becuz she might not realize she is or she is just trying to see if she still has what it takes, a reassurance kinda thing.





She is probably stressed out about her job not working out and that could be affecting whether or not you get pregnant. Or you could do like my husband and I did and just stop trying, both times we were trying and then gave up and both times I got pregnant.
Be cool, becool. It sounds like you're trying too hard.





Let's see...





She flirts, you think she's going through a mid-life crisis, you're doing everything possible to keep her happy and excited, and you think she's your soul-mate.





When you add it all up, your relationship sounds very one sided and unhealthy. Your wife appears to be discontent and she has pulled away from you emotionally, and you appear to be holding onto her for all you're worth. I know you won't believe me when I tell you this, but your efforts will only push her farther away. You'll see.





My advice is for you to get some marriage counseling.
She is probably depressed because she cannot conceive.





As for the flirting , everyone does it at some point. Maybe she is not feeling good about herself lately and needs reassurance. You may want to compliment her more and tell her how proud you are of her and that if there is anything you can do to help her with her career you are there for her.





If you can afford it this may be a good time to go away for awhile. Take her mind off of things and to reconnect.





You need to make love because you desire each other and not just to conceive. Who knows once you both relax it may just happen.





Go away and find each other again. That may be all it takes. Just a change of scenery !








Best of luck ! You sound like a great couple.



Be there for her when she needs you...but give her the personal space she needs. women like that... When she needs to talk she'll come to you, but DON';T force her into talking to you about her problems, it will just make things worse. More than likely she is NOT being unfaithful, she is just going through a phase where she needs to figure out who she is. Don't become depressed over the situation yourself, because you may make things worse for her. When she is ready to talk, you may be to depressed of caught up with your own feelings to be there to help. Definitely don't want to pass up the opportunity to make things better for the both of you. Just keep doing your best and it will surely pass over. HANG IN THERE!!! women can be complicated.
I just want to say that you are a good husband to be concerned, and from what I can tell you really love her, and reading your question made me smile to see that.





Anyway, it is understandable that she is extremely upset, especially about the whole conceiving thing. I speak from experience when I say that she will maybe be feeling inferior, dysfunctional, and other such obvious feeling that accompany something like that. To make her feel better, never stop letting you know that you love her just as much as you always have, because she could be afraid that you will leave her over it.


Just try and be there for her and let her talk to you if she needs to, and cry. Be nice and try to make things the least stressful for her.
You explain what's going on in her life, but you tell us nothing about her behavior. Has she lost her sex drive? Is that what this is about?





If she's old enough to go through a mid-life crisis, she may be past the ideal child bearing years. Have you two been checked out by a doctor? Identify the problem.





If she's unhappy, that unhappiness is likely coming from within her. Whatever those issues are should be addressed by her. You jumping through hoops is kind and thoughtful, but is only likely to make you feel more frustrated and helpless.
Ask her what's bothering her.





Then LISTEN to her response.





REALLY LISTEN.





Don't give advice immediately. Ask her what she thinks would be the best way of solving her problem or problems, whatever they may be.





Ask her what she wants.





Keep in mind, it's not all about ';excitement.'; It's about communication.





If she's really depressed, you might want to probe and see if she's open to the idea of counselling (make it couples counselling if she takes offense).





Good luck.
MId-life crisis, how about the monthly disappointment that she won't be a mother. Most women find it very difficult to see their friends with children and know they can't have one, no matter how hard they have been trying. You and your wife need to take it to the next step and see a doctor to see if either partner is responsible for your inability to conceive.
May not pass soon.. that is wishful thinking. Broken relationships don't necessarily heal. Having a child at this time is probably the worst thing you can do. This will only confound your problems, and it will bring a child in this world who is forced to grow up under chaotic circumstances. Be mature, see a marriage counselor. And accept the fact that this person may not be ';The one';.
allow her to have her moods and let her work through it, be there for her and let her talk ,really listen. lt sounds like you may be feeling a little insecure ,but if you really trust her...trust her ! otherwise you may just push her away. dont worry about the pregnancy for now ,its all on Gods time. maybe some emotional things need to be worked out first. ,take each day at a time dont let it get you too depressed. be strong and supportive but don't be a rug.dont just spoil her with stuff get down to gut level and share the real stuff of your fears, hopes, and all that really matters
You sound like a wonderful man and If she is your soulmate then I wish you and wife the very best and I truly hope that she is faithful like you said, All you can do at this point is to talk to her and really put your true feelings out there and if she really loves you she will listen and be very honest with you.





Good luck.
she has her mind elsewhere about her job and shes probably starting to realize that shes getting older and theres only so much time to be able to change her career. take her out to do something that goes along with the career that she really wanted to do, it will probably make her happy. for example, if she wanted to be a singer, take her to a concert, if she likes comedy take her to a show. but make it a suprise.
you should relax. If you love your wife and she loves you. You should have nothing to worry about. If you want to do something different you have a different kond of date night. suprise her. leave notes around the house where she can find it. Or you can have a date treaure hunt. For women you wouldn't have to do alot. Just hold you woman tight and tell her you love and appreciate her.
Wow. I'll bet it is because of the baby situation. I feel for you two. Yes, I believe it is just a phase you two are going through, maybe not a 'crisis', but a phase, yes. Be good to eachother and support eachother through this time. And don't despair!! My friend was not even supposed to be able to have children at ALL. That was ten years ago when I first met her. Needless to say she has a beautiful four year old little girl now!!! Your poor wife. She needs to know everything is going to be okay. I'll pray for you two and good luck!
Being not able to conceive might be a lil hard on her since that is our duty or destination as a woman to do. DO NOT let her know you worry about being able to conceive. oh i know take walks while eating ice cream or watch movies both enjoy like the old days or even make her an appointment for the spa it will be great for her. Keep trying and most of all love love her.
Trying for 9 months and how old are you guys if she is going through a mid life crisis? I am in my mid 20s and have been trying for 2 years so don't let that get her upset. Life is not always the way we planned it. Everything happens for a reason. Things can be upsetting, but if you are really worried you should go seek professional counseling.
it doens't sound like your relationship is in jeopardy. trying to conceive is a stressful time, and stress can put a damper on ANY relationship. just keep trying. if it doesn't happen in another 6 months, seek fertility counseling. as for the stress, talk about everything! it can do wonders. and just be each other's support system. that's what marriage is all about.
Honestly, there's only so much advice that strangers on the internet can give because we don't know anything about the two of you except for a paragraph about your wife.





In the end, you need to talk to her about it, because our advice is only going to go so far when we don't know anything about you.
You seem to really love each-overr which is good asthat'ss what keeps the relationship steady.


The thing to do is take her out, be romatic, give her surprises and make her feel like the most amazing women on the planet. She'll love you for that, when you get home take it slow dont rush anything because otherwise all she'll think is that you want her for that.


I think it will pass though she may be feeling inscure about her self or something so make her feel amazing and youll get lots of brownie points (:


Hope i helped



you sound very nice, look at womansavers.com they help men also. i think i would just try to keep happy by doing things you like, work on yourself to make you happy. dress nice so you feel good. get your toes done it always makes me feel good.there will be a pretty woman on her knees working on your toes . when you go to bed with your wife she will feel how soft your feet are and get a little worried that your changing . let her be your puppy for a wile.
try taking a vacation! I know that helped my parents when things were getting a little rough - and they definitely rekindled that spark :) try a romantic destination, or someplace meaningful to both of you - my parents went to switzerland last year, where my dad proposed, it was very romantic, and just what they needed...good luck babe!!
Just sit her down and talk to her. I know as a guy that seems like a horrible idea. But woman like that sort of thing. If you feel awkward talking about it then start the conversation by saying that you're not sure your wording is going to be right the first time but to bare with you. Women like to talk about issues it's the way they're made
Women need to feel appreciated and beautiful.


Tell her and show her how you feel and how much you appreciate her.


We tried for a long time to have a child. When it isn't happening you feel like less of a woman no matter what anyone says. You see all of these women having babies and you get even more depressed. I hated my job. I finally got pregnant while on Christmas break from my job. 6 months after our son was born I quit the job I hated and got one that I love.





Take her on a trip and just relax.
honestly the best thang you can do is love her and keep god first in you all lives....dnt give up and continue to stay positive....maybe god just sees it as a child not being in you all lives right now....maybe he wants you two to wait.....maybe god is trying to tell you that adoption is the answer.....trust me its best to wait until god says so....and whtever happn just continue to stay grounded and keep her happy and healthy...gggggggggggooooooooodddddddd lllllllluuuuuuccccccckkkkkk



It could be early menopause..or the not being able to conceive. alot of women take it hard when its difficult to impregnate..alot of females go their enitre lives dreaming/preparing for parenthood. maybe, she should talk to a dr. with you too. it could really help because drs can ask alot more questions then you could think up...or it could be striaght up derpression. either way, support her, encourage her, do what it takes..you must care deeply about her otherwise you woulndt be asking for opinions you know?


good luck
I doubt it is a ';mid-life crisis';, she is probably just getting frustrated with no luck trying to conceive. Just be there for her and everything will be ok...if she feels like you are acting strange, she is going to seem more distant. So, just be your normal self.
No one knows how long it's going to last so be prepared to be there for her in the thick of it. Take trips together. Do things with her that she enjoys (crafts, dancing, whatever it is she wants to do). The key is to minimize her stress level. If she likes to take 3 hor bubble baths, let her... Don't forget hugs and kisses.





Best wishes to you both.
My Husband and I where trying to conceive for 2 years!! The doctor told him to take vitamin C and he did now we have a 1 1/2 month old baby girl. I think you should go to the pharmacy and get some vitamin C and get stared on that baby. YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE. My husband and I are the most happiest parents now. good luck.
Sorry for this I know it can be tough. Just be as patient as possible, I am sure she just needs time. Let her know that you are there for her any time she needs you. I know that with me its always nice to be told that you are loved and appreciated. I am sure things will get better in time.